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Misadventurous Melissa

Everyday is an adventure, or misadventure as the case may be. It is the latter that makes for the best stories, inspiring the name of my blog. I'm a nurse and an attorney (and way too silly sometimes). I am retired now. WELCOME to my blog! This is a work of fiction inspired by true events. The patients I refer to are a patchwork quilt of various patient's problems mixed together. If you think you recognize someone, you are wrong. These people do not really exist.

Friday, December 23, 2005

Happy Politically Correct Whatever

For Our PC Friends:

"Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, our best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all. We also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2006, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. And without regard to the race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee. By accepting these greetings you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher. This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher."

For Our Non-PC Friends:

Here's wishing all of You a

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year


~ Home

6 Comments:

At 12/23/2005 04:15:00 PM, Blogger Sarah said...

OK, sometimes it is nice to have an attorney around for a good laugh!

 
At 12/23/2005 04:24:00 PM, Blogger Running2Ks said...

Well then, I like the second one better. I prefer efficiency.

Season's Greetings!
Happy Christmakwanzakkah

 
At 12/23/2005 07:44:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I object! I'm not sure what I object to yet, but I'm sure I'll be able to find something to be upset about if I reread your post enough times.

(That was supposed to be funny. Sorry if it wasn't.)

Anyway, Merry Christmas to everybody.

 
At 12/23/2005 08:25:00 PM, Blogger Michelle said...

Thankgod i'm not politically correct!!
Merry Christmas Melissa, and the rest of your readers :o)

 
At 12/23/2005 10:45:00 PM, Blogger Tati said...

Thanks for the laugh!

Have a wonderful Christmas, Melissa! Give the "boys" an extra treat from me.

 
At 12/24/2005 10:34:00 AM, Blogger Melissa said...

Thanks, everyone. Oh and Stick, if you don't find something offensive in this post, I'm sure you will find it in some of the other posts. Offensive is what I do best.

 

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