The Procedure

They said that the bowel prep would be the worst part of the colonoscopy. It was bad, but I was prepared. For a day and a half, I had nothing but clear liquids. I was hungry, dizzy and reminded why diets don't work. No one can be that hungry for very long before they fall off the wagon and binge.



I was prepared for the salty elixirs, the pills and the quarts of water that had to be drunk. I knew that my day would revolve around the toilet. Everything was going according to plan. What I did not anticipate was the nausea. I don't know about you, but for me, nausea is just about the worst thing. The unending hours of nausea wore me down. I also didn't know that the bowel flushing would last all night. Unfortunately, a couple of times, I failed to wake when nature called. The next morning, even though I was still so sick, I had to wash linens. It was an ugly night.



For the actual procedure, I was a nervous wreck. When they wheeled me into the procedure room, I suddenly felt claustrophobic and wanted to jump off the table and run. But knowing that I could run and they wouldn't be able to stop me, calmed me down. I just needed to know that there was an escape route in order to feel better. When the nurse came at me with the demerol, the panic resumed. My escape route was about to close. While alert and oriented, they could not stop me if I bolted. If drugged, they could hold me down, drug me some more and force me into submission. I'm a nurse, I know how these things work.



Seventy-five milligrams of demerol was put into my IV line. It hit me like a ton of bricks. The room started spinning, my skin flushed hot and I felt out of control. A few seconds later, I went limp. The battle was over. I was now all theirs.



The doctor did not have an easy time. Part way through the procedure, he had to start over with a different scope. I'm a pediatric size. Many years ago, I had some fibroids removed from my uterus, which resulted in scar tissue. The doctor had a terrible time getting past the adhesions. They kept flipping me from side to side and someone kept digging their hand into my abdomen, while the doctor kept inflating me with air like I was a balloon. It was painful, I was starting to moan, so an additional 75 milligrams of demerol plus 4 milligrams of vistaril was given.



The procedure usually takes between 30 and 45 minutes. They worked on me for an hour and fifteen minutes. It was worth it, though. They found a small polyp that could have turned into colon cancer someday. It was removed. As awful as the procedure was, it sure beat having cancer surgery and chemo some day in the future.



Lindsay picked me up after the procedure and it being dinner time, we went out to dinner. I had not had any solid food in almost 48 hours and was starving. I just picked at my dinner, though. My stomach hurt and I was still dizzy and nauseated. After dinner, I wobbled to the restroom. I had just gotten inside the stall when all hell broke loose. I vomited all over the floor and the seat of the toilet. Feeling guilty, I tried to wipe it up with paper towels.



Feeling better, I wanted to stop at Target on the way home to buy some batteries. As I walked out the front door, I became dizzy and flushed again. There was a bench next to the door. I sat down and spent a couple of minutes vomiting in plastic shopping bags. Lindsay went back in the store to keep me well supplied with bags. I suppose it could be embarrassing to vomit next to the entrance of a busy store, but I was too sick to care.



On the drive home, I threw up again in the Target bags. I don't know how people get hooked on drugs like demerol. It just makes me puke my guts out. Demerol was by far the worst part of the colonoscopy. In five years, I get to go back and do the same thing again and I'm glad. The colonoscopy wasn't fun, but it sure beats colon cancer.