Hospital Chart Bloopers
Actual writings from hospital charts:
1. The patient refused a autopsy.
2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her husband states
she was very hot in bed last night.
5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side for over a year.
6. On the second day the knee was better, and on the third day itdisappeared.
7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She also appears to be
depressed.
8. The patient has been depressed since she began seeing me in 1993.
9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male, mentally alert but forgetful.
11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
12. She is numb from her toes down.
13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
14. The skin was moist and dry.
15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
18. She stated that she had been constipated for most of her life,
until she got a divorce.
19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our car for physical therapy.
20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accommodation.
21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is circus sized.
22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
23. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
24. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
25. Patient has two teenage children, but no other abnormalities.
Thanks, Sarah
6 Comments:
Now see, if there are past lives, the patient COULD have had a history of suicides. LOL!
Thanks, Christine. Please come visit again sometime.
Good point, Brandy. Some of these aren't bloopers. They make perfect sense to me, although I do keep wondering about the circus sized penis. Does that mean it's big or little or are there clowns painted on it?
LOL, the first one is my fav...too funny!
It also makes perfect sense. I would also refuse an autopsy.
a circus sized penis is better than circus peanuts any day :)
Well that depends, are they salted or unsalted? (The peanuts) ;)
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