The Impostor

A crazy lady is staying with me. She is a dead ringer for my mother, but it is not her. This lady is an impostor. Mom is a little forgetful and ditsy at times, but she is nothing like the impostor.

My dad is in the hospital again with COPD exacerbation, so mom is staying with me. I'm going to describe just one day with mom. It starts at midnight when I come home from work. The house is lit up like a retail establishment. The other homes on the block are dark, with maybe just one light on. My house has every light on, inside and out.

Mom has moved her car, so that I'm unable to put my car in the garage. I park on the street and walk in the house. Something is hissing in the kitchen. It is a tea kettle boiling furiously with only about an inch of water left in the bottom. Could mom have gone to bed and left that disaster waiting to happen?

I go looking for her, but mom's bed is neatly made. I check the other rooms. She is not home. I search the yard, front and back. Mom is gone. I'm wondering if she locked herself out and wandered off, not knowing what to do. Perhaps a kind neighbor took her in. Maybe she fell, broke her hip and I need to try harder to find her. I don't want to call the police, but I don't know what else to do. I go upstairs to get a flashlight to better search the shrubbery one last time before calling the cops.

On the way up the stairs, I run into mom coming down the stairs. She had been in my bathroom getting all dolled up. She has her own private bath, but forgot about that and used my bathroom instead. It didn't occur to me to search my own bath.

Her hair and make up were done and she was nicely dressed. She had been getting ready for some visitor who had called and told her to put some coffee on. Mom had forgotten how to work the coffee maker, so she was boiling water to pour through the coffee maker. She is having trouble with the concept of having to push an "on" switch.

There was a message on the answering machine, but it didn't come even remotely close to anyone saying that they were on their way over for an visit and to put some coffee on. It was just a message from my brother asking where our parents were.

Mom, although looking forward to her mystery visitor, was worried because her purse was gone. She believed someone broke in the house and stole it. I searched the house and found the purse in the bottom of my closet.

Her next worry was that her car keys were gone. I searched the house, her car, the yard and up and down the street. The keys were definitely gone. The keys were lost during the dog chase. Mom had gone out front, but hadn't quite latched the door. The dogs pushed the door open and took off in five different directions. It took an hour, but eventually all five dogs were caught or returned home on their own. Mom had driven up and down the streets looking for the dogs and searched on foot. The keys must have dropped on the ground and are gone.

My next day off will be spent getting new keys from the car dealer, having a house key made and hiring a locksmith to remove her gas cap. It will be replaced with gas cap that doesn't lock.

It was very late when I finally got to bed. I fell asleep. The next thing I knew, mom was wandering around my bedroom. I ignored her and hoped that she would go back to bed. Then, she started poking at my legs.

"Mom. What are you doing?"

"Trying to get in bed."

I tried to orient her and tell her to go back to her bed. She left.

I woke up again. Mom was telling the dogs to move over. Once again she was trying to get in my bed. I asked her if she knew where her bed was. She said no. I got up, asked her to follow me and took her back to her bed.

The next morning, mom came in my room a little after seven am and was worried about my getting to work on time. I reminded her that I go to work in the afternoon. She then asked if she drove home right now, would she get home before dark. I told her that she lives a half hour away, but that she would be staying with me until Daddy got home. She didn't believe me that it was such a short trip. I just rolled over and went back to sleep.

Soon, I woke up to the door bell. Mom had locked herself out. She forgot where the hidden key was. I was woken up one last time when mom decided to come in my room again and sing to the dogs.

Everyday when I visit Daddy, he tells me with a wild look in his eyes to "take care of your mother."It is starting to sink in just what he means.

In the meantime, I'm feeling really, really tired.