The Luau

I don't think it's possible to go to Hawaii without going to a luau. Sure they're cheesy and the food is generally bad, but I still like to go. This time I got lucky, though. The food was actually good. Of course, I stayed away from the poi and that disgusting cooked pig that they pull out of the ground. I got steak and chicken, so it was possible for me to pretend that it wasn't really a dead animal I was eating. There was also all of the booze you could drink, but they were watered down. Five mai tais would normally kill me. At most I had only a one beer-type buzz. The other people at our table were interesting. A couple from Beijing were on their honeymoon, as was a couple from Detroit. Another couple, who had nine children, came from Salt Lake City. I figured that they were Mormon, except that they were keeping up with me in drinking mai tais. I didn't want to ask what was up with that. The Chinese couple fascinated me. The husband earned his living by buying and selling companies. I could see that happening in Hong Kong, but I didn't know that Beijing was that capitalistic. They were both fluent in English, well-educated and appeared well-off. The rest of their honeymoon was going to be spent in downtown L.A. and Las Vegas. The other people at the table were horrified about their going to L.A. They imagined gang shootings going on all around them. We assured them that they were going to a nice, safe area. People are so funny. Doesn't everyone know that it's east L.A. and south-central L.A. where you can get shot for no particular reason? Downtown is where the rich and homeless people hang-out, but not with each other. Crime is minimal there, unless you count peeing on the street. Anyway, this is us above, after we got our lei greetings. That to me means a flower lei, but to the luau people, it meant a string of shells. As you can see, I'm getting a collection of them. I guess if I want a flower lei, I need to buy my own.

Above is a photo from the show. Sorry that it's blurry. My camera can't handle movement, especially in dim lighting. This was the funniest of all of the photos.

Afterwards, the dancers came out so that people could get photos. That's Lindsay with a hula dancer. I also got my photo taken with a male dancer, but I won't post it. I had no idea that my dress turns transparent when a camera flash hits it.